Crowds of American tourists have been queuing all week at the entrance to The House of Commons Public Gallery in the hope of seeing Boris Johnson reprise his recent impersonation of Donald Trump.
Zeb Abernathy, a Grits and Chitlins Magnate from Arkansas said: ‘I done been waitin’ in-line at this here fairy palace for five hours, coz’n I heard that your version of Trump is doin’ another show later this afternoon. Shucks, I just can’t wait to see him abusing women in real life just like he did earlier this week on the tele-vision.’
The surge in demand for places has been fuelled after Mr Johnson took a leaf out of the Donald Trump manual on how to be a mendacious nasty bastard, by being outrageously provocative and utterly vile in an attempt to shift the agenda away from his catastrophic and incompetent administration’s mishandling of the illegal prorogation of Parliament.
Instead of making a contrite apology for interrupting her Summer holiday by inflicting the spooky and sepulchral Jacob Rees-Mogg on The Queen in person, Johnson decided to attempt to whip up hatred and unrest by using what he clearly knew to be controversial language dripping in bile and hatred to make female MPs feel abused and vulnerable.
One ERG member speaking off the record said: ‘We all thought that Boris was just a bit of a silly old upper class duffer and fool, however we now know that he’s a conniving nasty piece of work admirably capable of stooping to any depths to keep himself in power. In other words, a real true blue Tory. Excellent!’
Nigel Farage who watched the debate live on TV was heard to say to one associate: ‘Hey, not only is he aping Trump but the devious so-and-so’s now nicked my spiel too.’
Meanwhile after seeing the footage of Johnson’s abominable behaviour Mr Trump commented: ‘Hey, not bad, but the kid’s still got a helluva lot more to learn before he can become a real deal bona fide scheming tyrant like me.’