In the wake of the disgraced Presidents Club being wound down after having been exposed as being nothing more than a thinly veiled excuse for a knocking shop, bemulleted strip club owner Peter Stringfellow has raise his head above the parapet having sniffed out a potential opportunity.

Speaking in the Daily Mail he said: ‘This is a very delicate area and fraught with difficulty. These guys were essentially trying to visit a high end clip joint by stealth. But why bother? All they needed to do was hold their event at one of my establishments and problem sorted.’

The aging sleaze supremo continued: ‘But as the old saying goes, when one door closes another opens as this presents a very exciting opportunity for Stringfellows. When the Presidents Club reforms on the quiet, after all the stink dies down, if they’d like to contact me they can hold next year’s event here in the strictest confidence. They’ll find my girls quite amenable and high rollers certainly won’t need to worry about being exposed in the media. At Stringfellows you get exactly what it says on the tin – top-notch birds and 100% discretion. Oh, and me as well of course!’

Meanwhile compere of the disgraced Dorchester event, funny man David Walliams, commented: ‘Oooh, what a right old kerfuffle! But I saw nothing. Right? Got that?’